Now that I am a mommy, I understand why my parents did and said the things they did. They were looking out for me, they were protecting me, they just wanted the best for me; it was “for [my] own good.” Although I should have realized that much sooner I appreciate it and understand it all now and that is thanks to my daughter. I want nothing but the best for her; I want to look out for Sophia and protect her, just like my parents wanted, did, and still are doing for me. So, I’ve been thinking… and there is just so much I have thought about that I want Sophia to know and understand. I hope that one day she will be much smarter than me and realize it sooner than I did, that I will not do and say the things just because I am her mother, but because I love her and she is my world, and that I will protect forever.
Here’s a list of things I want Sophia to know and understand (warning: this may all be very cliche but they’re lifes rules that I agree with):
~ What goes around comes around: I’m a big believer in karma; I mean look my first child was a girl and everything I ever did to my mother and my aunt (who raised me) is going to hit me back 10x harder than ever. Haha! I’m so blessed with a girl but I had high hopes for a boy… Karma didn’t let that one slide though. I want Sophia to understand that her actions–whether good or bad–will have consequences. Always. Sometimes it could take a while, sometimes it could happen in a second but what she needs to know is that every decision she makes will affect her life. Her next move, the way she treats people, how she decides to go about a situation will all have it’s own outcome. I want her to have a clear concious… and the way to help that is by constantly reminding herself about Karma (because she is one heck of a bitch!!!).
~ Never fall for someone unless they’re willing to catch you: This happens to be one of my all time favorite sayings. Sophia will “fall in love” countless times. Her heart will break over and over. We’ve all gone through it… every guy was our “true love” until we actually met him (in my case, my hubba Steven (love you babe)). It took me a while to realize who it was I really cared for, and how much I cared for him. We had just as many downs as we did ups. My fiance fought for our relationship. He was completely selfless… as I, although I hate to admit it, was extremely selfish. He never, ever, doubted our love. He never let go of our love… even when I tried, and as I tried to, I wanted to push him away… which only made him fight harder. Sophia, I want her to be able to know if a guy who she may think she’s in love with is just a boy who doesn’t want love, and the guy who is nothing but an asshole. I want her to see her guy as someone who treats her like his most prized possession. I want Sophia to know her worth, and know that she deserves a love so fulfilling.
~ Treat others the way you want to be treated: Now this phrase we all learned in kindergarten. Easy. Very understandable. BUT the world we live in now in days is just so cruel and so selfish that no one lives by this anymore (at least they are extremely hard to find). I want to teach Sophia that although there are cruel people in our world, we still have to be kind. We want to treat others with respect, and kindness; we want to be loyal to our friends, and honest. Just as we are doing those things, people will stab us in the back, they will not have a care for us and our respect… but we will still hold our heads high and be polite… but baby if you feel threatened or extremely disrespected than put your guard up and defend yourself, you have that right.
~ Let love find you: I could not stress this one enough… and again I will use my fiancé and my relationship as an example. Sometimes people are just too focused looking for love or to be loved. Some people strongly dislike the single life… I–must admit–was one of those people before I met Steven. I was young. I liked the attention. I liked to feel loved. I thought I should always have a boyfriend… I searched for love all the time and every time I thought I found it, I lost it all over again. Then one time, I was hurt. My heart just kept on breaking into tinnier pieces, I had enough! I was single for a while… I wanted absolutely nothing to do with these
men (boys). It was summer, I was having a blast with my best friends. I was 16. So young. Steven was already a friend of mine for almost a year (can’t lie, I had the hugest crush on him… I mean he is a beautiful man, how could I not?), we started to hang out with the same group of friends, then him and I started to hang out on our own, then we talked more, flirted a lot, and then our feelings for each other just kept growing. It felt so natural, as if we were connected, as if this was meant to be. I never felt the way I did for him ever before. Obviously we started dating, I became his girlfriend; we had ups and downs of course, break-ups and make-ups. But one of the things I learned from our relationship was that you must be patient when it comes to love. Love is always there, just not exactly when you’re looking for it. Love will find you… don’t lose faith in that. There’s no need to rush it, there’s no need to fight it. When love is near, it is incredibly hard to miss–and that my dear is a beautiful feeling.
~ Choose joy: “There are so many beautiful reasons to be happy” and why not accept that? Yes, we all have bad days. Yes, we all feel crappy sometimes… but choose a different path and stay on that path thinking nothing but of happy thoughts. Feel content. Feel peace. Feel love. Because they all lead to happiness. So wake up in the morning, and after you’ve made the decision of what you’re going to have for breakfast, make the decision to be happy by simply choosing to be.
There’s many more I’d love for Sophia to know, and that I will continue with next time. For now… I hope you all have enjoyed this list and I have high hopes for sharing this with Sophia. Love it or hate it ❤
TO BE CONTINUED…
X’s & O’s